Free time? Maybe on eBay!

Before having my baby, there were a lot of times when I thought that I could fill my life with something more. I had enough of the same routine: go to work, come home, have dinner, watch TV, go to sleep and so on. So, I told my husband one day, that I want to have a baby. I wanted for a long time, even before I met my husband, but there were all the time other priorities to look after.
Even when I told him first time he said: "Let's wait another 6 months." And I said: "No! I had enough of waiting. I am stopping the pills now regardless if you want me or not." So, he had to put up with my decision.

Few months later, we announced it to everybody and everybody said...we should have waited. "There will be no more time for you; your marriage will be over; no more sex, no more free time. Your baby will be crying all day, you have to change stinky nappies, you won't even have time to breathe..."

And we were both thinking: "...but we have so much free time right now, that can be filled with enjoying a bub."

Reality is, that the free time we used to have before, has been filled, but along with it the time that was ours.

After a long labour, when they put the baby on my chest, all I could think of was: "Finally I can get some sleep" I was exhausted!

They put me in this room (my luck a private room) with bubby next to me. I was still so muffenish and big like a cow, that I could barely move. I still couldn't sleep on the side, because my pelvic bone was hurting me and I had enough of sleeping on my back for the past 6 months.

Baby was crying from time to time...it felt like every 5 min, even if it was every 2 hours. She wanted milk, she wanted love and attention..I wanted to rest, I wanted peace and quiet, not to mention that I had drips in both my hands, so I couldn't hold her properly ( I had to ask midwife always to put her in my arms); I had no milk to give her, but she was hungry and couldn't understand while all of the suddent there is no supply anymore...and midwifes didn't really cared either. All they were saying to me was: "Welcome to parenting..." like parenting was meant to be this horrible thing that you got yourself into because you didn't wanted to listen of others.

We got home and then it all started: the realisation of another routine, but this time a 3 hours routine, not a 24hrs one: sleeping, eating, starring at us ...sleeping, eating...playing. It started the "I am hungry, I am wet, I want attention, I want to play, I want dummy, I want this, I want that...and I want it NOW!"

You know, they say in books or on the internet, to take advantage of when the baby is sleeping so you can get some rest too.The house it's not important to be cleaned, but they forget to say that you still have to wash your baby's clothes, to prepare her bottles in case you're breastfeeding (maybe they presume that everybody is breastfeeding?), to prepare the bag in case you go out or take the pram downstairs (if you leave in an unit) to have yourself a bath or just use the toilet and when the baby is young you can't do this all the time, because you either need to hold her or keep an eye on her, or she doesn't like it when you leave the room, etc.

So, these are some practical ideeas, not just the chatting-chatting, talky-talky that you find on the internet or on all these books.

* When in hospital, after having your baby, take advantage of the baby nursery. Even if its just for one night, so that you can recharge your batteries. Remember to ask your partner or appropriate familly to bring your some fruits to boost your vitamins level (it will also make you feel better) and drink lots of fluids.
* When you come at home, if you are breastfeeding, store some of the milk for the night shifts, or if you are bottle feeding prepare a bottle and keep it in the fridge so that your partner can help from time to time and you can get some most precious rest. Your body is recovering and needs lots of help from you. This also gives the partner the chance to bond as well with the baby.
* If mother, or mother in law or any other relatives offers to look after the baby for a few hours or to cook or help you clean the house, take it. It will also make you feel better that the house doesn't crumble to the grounds because you can't be Wonder Woman.
* When your baby sleeps, if you can't sleep, don't start vacuming or dusting in the house. Prepare ahead for the time when your baby will be awake and you won't be able to sterilize bottles, or prepare her food or prepare her bath, etc. Think ahead of what you need to do once she wakes up, but you have your hands tided around her.
* Buy lots of bibbies. Not 6 or 10...I mean lots. Once the baby starts teething, she will be dribbling a lot and wet bibbies one by one. You might need to change them more often than in the begining and you don't want to leave your baby all day with wet bibbies around her neck. She can get chesty.
* If you leave on 1st, 2nd...etc floor and need to take the pram down, but you are alone at home and don't know what to do, the safest place you can put your baby its her cot. If she has a mobile, even better. It will keep her occupied. Take all you need downstairs and then come back to prepare your baby for the going out.
* If you need to use the bathroom, or take a shower, you can do it when baby sleeps and if it has to happen when she is awake, leave the bathroom door open and if you hear her crying you can talk to her so that she knows she is not alone.

Remember, always to pay attention to your baby and her needs. You can't spoil a young baby, all you give her is the basic love and care.

These are a few tips that I have discovered and made my life easier. Truth is, that once baby is in your world, your world is mostly your baby. So, time for you to check the forums, facebook or buy things on eBay won't come from the beginning. It all works itself in time. The older the baby, the easier to juggle with the little free time you have, but babies are so cute when they little and still dependent on you, so don't waste this time. Enjoy it!

Hello and Welcome! (about pregancy and parenting books)

Hi everyone!

Welcome to an informative page about babies. This page I have created in my wish of exchanging impressions, feelings, experiences with and from other mums.

When I found out I was pregnant I started buying lots of books about pregnancy and parenting. One thing was sure, the pregnancy book somehow helped and somehow scared me. The help came in me understanding what happens inside, where we can't see but we are so curious on finding out what happens with our little/s one/s. The scare came when I was finding out lots of things about giving birth, things that probably I didn't wanted to know like 'eclampsia' - where they explain you how signs like 'nausea, vomiting, headaches or swollen feet' might be  signs of this life threatining complication of pregnancy.

Hey, who doesn't have all the above? There are only few women who don't experience swollen feet or vomiting in pregnancy, so the rest of us are stuck in this twisted world of too much information at the wrong time. Maybe some of you apreciate all that info, but I didn't. At times it scared me even more and I, beeing on a verge of having an anxiety disorder, didn't really liked all that stuff written there, that included very common symptoms of pregancy.

This way, every time I was seeing my doctor I used to ask him if there was something wrong with my swollen feet, because they used to get really big and everytime I was turning for my visit all the other women looked like they can wear all these fancy shoes or sandals and I was down to wearing twice bigger size of slippers...in winter!!!

Then, once my baby was born, which mind you I had quite a  scary birth, I was bombarded with lots of parenting books from my family and friends and found out that there are a lot of things that they are not saying in them. The hardest thing is to deal with all these issues by yourself and not having whom to ask.

Beeing just moved on the other side of the world, I don't have any mum friends in here, apart from my mother in law which  - I will tell later why and how - can be a pain at times when it comes about advices. More, here in Australia is totally different from my country of birth - Romania - where your baby has a paediatrician and you can ask him or her all the questions in the world, from how many pooes a baby should have to any medical conditions.

But not here. No! Here you have to call the midwife service for any nappies information and go see a doctor for any medical conditions. I don't understand. Why not all in one? It would be much easier for us mums. Here, to have a chance of talking with a midwife face to face, you need to make an appointment. So you ring this number and they put you to an answering machine, where you say when you would like to go for a visit and then you leave your details for them to call you back. They do call you, but if you're unable to answer because you're busy with your little one, then you have to call back and leave a message again...and so on and so forth. How stupid is this???

So I have created this page, not to be called and expect an answer here at every second or minute straight away, but to place our concerns and maybe have them answered from mums to mums, or share our experiences and hopefully other mums can learn from them. So, please, I invite you to share this world of motherhood with me or any other new mums who might like to join in.

Thank you,

mum of an angel.